FEMININE SOOTHE FOR MASCULINE MISERY

It's been almost 10 years of heartbreak and agony for those in support of the team from the red side of Manchester. Numerous managers have tried and failed in a bid to return the once giants to their glory days. The board have traversed the world in a bid to get a fitting captain to ride the storm and get them back to the shores of excellence.

From Scotland to Holland, to Portugal, to Norway, to Germany and back to the Netherlands. It's all been futile, and only recently began to look coherent with a glimpse of something that looks like a plan. Even at this, there is still a long way to go before true joy can return to the corridors of those who hold them dear.

10 years is a long time for a particular group of people to be going through constant heartbreak and seeking for succor from other channels wouldn't be out of place. The good news is that these fans don't have to look too far from their backyard to found said succor.

Just as the men's team has been on a topsy-turvy form, the women's team has been rampaging. It's been from one win to another without any sign of the ladies slowing down anytime soon. In the 2022/2023 season, the female devils have been rampant, winning 3 out of 3 games, scoring 10 goals in the process and conceding 0.

Led by captain Katie Zellem, who has also chipped in with a goal, the team has not only been winning matches, but have also outplayed every opponent they've come up against amassing 77%, 63% and 59% (an average of 66%) ball possession in the three matches played so far.

Led by a sturdy defense who have only allowed 4 shots on target in 3 matches, the United women's team is a complete team with goals and assists coming from all over the pitch. This is personified by the 2 goals and 1 assist contributed by fullback Maya Le Tissier, the 2 goals and 1 assist of midfielder Ella Toone, and fullback Ona Batlle's 3 assists.

It might still be early days in the season so far with stiffer and tougher opposition coming later, but the signs has been encouraging, with the players beaming with confidence and exuding class and quality reminiscent of the men's team of old.

For a team that only got recognized professionally in 2018, the team has taken huge strides in its development so far and it's rise has been meteoric. It might have been aided by the financial and economic clout of the Manchester United brand, but attributing everything to that would be taking away from the quite marvelous job done by the team in the last 4 years.

They achieved promotion from the championship in its first year of asking and have racked up impressive scorelines such as 12-0 against Aston Villa, 11-1 vs Leicester City, and 6-0 vs Burnley. This is in stark contrast to the men's team who has been hit for 6 by the likes of city rivals Manchester City and Tottenham.

The only semblance between the two teams has been their preferred 4-2-3-1 formation with the rest of the stats on opposite ends. While the men struggle to score goals, the women are running rampage, while they're leaking at the other end, the women are rock solid and while the male team are struggling for synergy, the female team is free flowing.

If you're a Manchester United fan and your heart can no longer carry the misery of the men's team, perhaps, it's time you switched allegiance to the women. Let their swashbuckling quality and excellence soothe the wounds of misery caused by the men's team.

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