Major Betman to Ground Control

almost 4 years ago (Edited)

Mission Log, stardate May 10th, 2020 – Major Betman reports about yesterday’s events. Sent a pair of odds at BetScorum, but still there’s no signs of life on this planet. Computer decisively rejected the most plausible explanation – that the whole population was exterminated by some terrible virus. Computer says its hogwash. So sending new odds today…

Betman was arguing with the computer last evening. He said the blockchain artefacts are clearly pointing to intelligent life on Earth, and I respond that it may only point to a computer AI or expert system at the surface of the planet. He swiftly rejected and said he would know. I reminded him how he ‘knew’ everything trough that Jupiter mission, and then he threatened to throw me out of the ship. When Betman grabbed his screwdriver, computer changed the voice to female and cried out:

Of course I wouldn’t, you stupid titty computer, this is only for screwing! And now Betman will send the last set of odds in search of terrestrial intelligence for this week, but if it fails again…

…then Ground Control, please send some update, patch, firmware, or whole new computer, because it is not possible to cooperate with this one any more. SCR value is obviously not an ECG that could prove existence of intelligent life anywhere in the Universe. Betman has waited more than a year on this mission, and he will wait a little bit more…