Penises: We Need More Penises
What's up with that?!
More penises will save STEEM!
Everyone knows that.
Over the years, the penis has been portrayed as something unfit for society. It's often hidden away, tucked into uncomfortable positions, and only gets to come out to play when someone has given the penis permission to do so. If it itches, you have to pretend that's not happening, especially in public, because there's a list full of perverts and you'll get added to it if you're not careful.
You know what I'm talking about. Just try to cross a border. "Have you been convicted of touching your penis in public? Piss in any alleys lately? Boxers or briefs?"
Imagine not being able to go to STEEMfest because your penis was itchy.
It's no wonder we don't have enough penises here; it's simply too dangerous for penises. Many penises wouldn't even know what to do with something like a blockchain, because where do you even put it?
But in order to have a strong economy, penises are required.
Lots of penises and lots of vaginas coming together means more penises and vaginas.
You can tell, just by looking around, and not seeing any penises; something must be done! Before it's too late.
The penis is repressed and just look what it's doing to the value of the token!
It's my theory that if I walk into a retail store and whip out my cock, I should be handed a gift card worth $100 in STEEM.
That would make things easier for all penises. Penises need things to be easy.
Those things would be flying off the shelves!
Trust me! I'm an expert.
We need more penis incentives, clearly.
We need to make this easy for the common penis because penises are usually only good for one thing but society can change!
If we just embrace the penis, allow the penises to grow, make the penis feel at home, for sure STEEM will moon.
It's so painfully obvious. Not enough penises.
It's something to think about.
Have a nice day.
This post gave me penis envy. I've never had penis envy before, but now I do.
I don't have it bad enough to go shopping for a penis, I'll probably just talk to my husband about maybe sharing his. I don't really need my own.
If I did want my own that would be okay with most people, but totally not okay with my husband I guess.
Hmm. I need to think about this...
ded, hilarious!
!dramatoken
Penis delegations!
You're a genius!
RCs -Rockhard Cock delegations soon I believe......
.....................................................^ coming
I know I'll be sharing mine.
Is his detachable? Because that would be handy. Worlds are opening before my eyes.
how come he don’t just post his penis already, i have before, he must be scared! lol
So you do not think that penis scarcity is a good thing? If you walk the streets of Moscow, you hardly see a penis.
We need more penises. Everywhere you look, you should see a penis.
Very funny @nonameslefttouse
Proud to support this penis article with ADSup. For more information see @adsup
Thank you for supporting my penis.
You're upping the drama to new levels! Have a DRAMA.
To view or trade
DRAMAgo to steem-engine.com.Damn. Wish I had a better one.
Pills and exercise!
More testosterone? The PC people wont like you.
Who are they to judge. <---- see what I did there!
I only have one penis in my life and that is plenty enough for me.
At least you're not afraid to say it.
Not sure what's wrong but when I try to read this post my app crashes.. must be the penis
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That's just the system trying to repress my penis.
Shenanigans!!!!
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Omg Partiko crashed 5 times trying to read this post. I had to open Steempeak.
Whoa #conspiracytheory is ripe
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You can create a penis token. One token per penis, and then you can vote with penis power.
Then everyone will get rich when there's a penis pump!
we need to be PC we can't only have penises.
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Your spot on, I'm off to show my penis some appreciation.
I'm so happy to hear that!
Now there's a coincidence for you. Today, I saw breasts on Steemit.
And guess why this is tagged 'parody'. LOL!
I just want to see a huge throbbing Green "Dildo" Candle!!! 😂
Well, I never thought I'd say this but — I'm fresh out of huge throbbing green dildos. Try back later.
I guess that means there's still a chance for Ned's Penis after all?
Ned's Penis will rise again!
With the next pump you mean?
One strong penis pump is all it'll take.
I just can't focus on metaphorical meanings when there are the words penis and balls in them. I spent a minute pondering how the penis was going to "rise up" and grab the balls, when the balls are beneath them. Too literal, self, it's a methaphor - move on!
So anyway, it is all the penis' fault if you ask me. Those things are just not attractive, and then the itch factor...
But good luck on rising up and grabbing those balls, penises.
I could explain but I'd have to draw a picture, unfortunately.
I could explain but
I'd have to draw a picture,
Unfortunately.
- nonameslefttouse
I'm a bot. I detect haiku.
I cant believe @haikubot didnt take the opportunity to haiku with penises.
Oh dear, if you drew me a picture it would be more metaphor, and this topic could get really convoluted.
That's got to be better than the Bots that we currently have. And I'm sure it would have more rising and staying power then our SBD coin. I would fear though that it would get swallowed up by a bunch of vaginas and lose its ejaculation power after coming. But I bet such a coin would get this platform excited
We can make penis great again!
Everyone should do charts like yours they’d be so much easier to read and understand 😆
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All they do is screenshot. Not everyone has this much skill so I don't think we'd see as many charts if we expected everyone to be as awesome as that, and if we didn't have charts, how would we know how much things are worth, aside from visiting the actual source of the screenshot, where most people go, to find that information, in real time.
I hold my penis every time I read your work.
I hold my penis every time I write my work. Sometimes I use it to operate the space bar so I can get things done faster.
Unfortunately, mine doesn't make it over the lip of the kitchen table to reach the spacebar.
Two words. Bar stool.
Mhmm.
I have never wanted to be a brother more.
Stop writing funny stuff that I want to resteem.
Never!
I thought we needed more boobs (.)(.)
That's just people trying to hold down the penis.
Hhahaha
It is my theory that penises are also rarely seen because of their sensitivity. They wouldn't like the cold and I'm sure they don't like to be sunburnt. Then what if they are mistaken for a snake and someone panics?
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In the event of a snake incident, dial 911. If it turns out to be just another penis. Relax, unless it's one of those penises on the list.
Happiness is a satchel full of dicks!
'Happiness' with a strong French Canadian accent sounds like, "A penis." They're trying to tell us something.
I just love the graph....Fuuuuuuuuuuck !
😆😁😂😝😭😝😂😁😆
That graph has been with me for about as long as my penis.
These are the steem parodies i love. My penis salutes you. Hands free of course
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My penis thanks you.
What an image indeed
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Simple keyboard
mufffunctionmalefrictionI meandictionDanget!! “Malfunction.” P.e.n.s—pens without theeyeI.It's okay. We can say 'penis' now. I've made it safe again.
Lol i didnt understand the purpose of this post until i read that post from taskmaster lol.
Good work
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Didn't want to make it too obvious. That's the bonus joke.
Congratulations @nonameslefttouse!
Your post was mentioned in the Steem Hit Parade in the following category:
I'm actually a bit disappointed that my prompt search on steem-engine for "PENIS" came up empty... I think you've missed one big monetization opportunity here!
You're right! I'll know better for next time.
If ur penis is sooo good, why don’t u post it then! dickless? hua chicken shit?
Is that how you normally ask for dick pics?
“lol! Nope first time for everything! ./s jk”