A Long Travel, A Farewell and A Thought of Life

Qing Ming, or Memorial Day for the Ancestors for the Chinese speaking community, is a significant annual tomb cleaning for the entire family, not only to keep the ancestor’s ground clean, but it is also an opportunity for the elderly to tell the family heritage story to the youngest generation.

It does sound a little like the Passover Story for the Jews or the Hijrah (the great migration) of the Muslims; however, in a more personal and smaller scale.

Though this is still a usual annual get-together family task; this year was slightly different.

Horrid News

One of my dad’s best men, uncle Onn, has suddenly passed away. He had no wife and kids, a strong-willed individual who never had a proper place of his own. All his life his dedication was to teach kids English and first-aid for the Red Crescent (Red Cross for Western countries), and with no siblings and parents passed on for decades, his life is like a rolling weed.

If it was not for a small Christian community who has been trying to reach out to him with providing food aid daily, no one would have noticed he passed on, in a could-be swift but painful way.

It happened a week prior to our travelling back to my parents’ hometown for the Qing Ming festival, when we were told by one of his closest student (later became friends) who took care of his funeral. When the usual Christian friend sent the usual afternoon dessert / early dinner to his rented house, his trusty bicycle was there, but there was no response. He wasn’t picking up the phone.

Feeling worried, the Christian friend called uncle Onn’s closest student who still works as a volunteer in the Red Crescent society. The student rushed over as soon as he can, but it took at least 30 minutes to arrive.

Cracking down the back kitchen door after managed to climb over the fence, in horror they found uncle Onn’s deceased body in the toilet.

According to the autopsy report, the coroner in horror found that his intestines were all tangled up. Not knowing the possible cause.

All along my dad knew about his friend’s hernia condition, and being an elderly of 80 years young and under the operation table’s mercy 3 times my dad had been trying to convince him to go for the hernia ”patching up” procedure because it was noninvasive though requires a lot of rest.

Being a strong-willed freedom loving individual, uncle Onn has been procrastinating such decision because he didn’t want to die on the table – so to speak.

From what we were briefed before for my dad’s Laparoscopic groin hernia repair, this usually happens to a guy and if it is not repaired in its initial stage, the larger the tear, the intestines could “slide out and in” from the tear and will cause entanglement.

That was the only possible explanation from the post mortem report.

Living Life Alone

This actually got me thinking really deeply about life and why the Bible speaks of the importance of Ekklesia (the assembly of the people – of same faith / believes).

Imagine if you are an isolated individual who couldn’t care less of the world, whatever happens to you at the end of your journey, like a blip, you disappear.

If you disappeared in an isolated place, the world could care less; but if you expire in a rented place, that causes inconvenience to those around you if they do not know you; and wouldn’t that be one of the saddest thing to know?


the last photo taken with his students, uncle Onn is the gentleman at the far right

The one good thing about uncle Onn was though he was a free-spirited individual; he had an impact in the neighbourhood and society in where he was. Just 5 days prior to his demise he just attended this very student’s 60th birthday dinner; and if not for the Christian friend who regularly sends afternoon tea / dinner over to his house, his body would have been decayed in the toilet, turning the rented house into a haunted house.

When they found his body, the police noticed his body was still soft, and the time of death was about 4 hours prior to their discovery.

Was shown with the photo how they found his demised body, but I feel it is not honoring him if this photo was shared. It was really sad.

In the end, uncle Onn had a decent funeral service, and all his students who remembered him contributed a small piece of sum to help with the whole process and a place to rest his ashes.


This has truly made me think deeply, as I silently watched my dad grief quietly, and we hope when the traffic is less hectic, I’ll bring him to see his friend one last time for closure.

Note: The funeral photos were sent by his student, with consent to share part of it

This report was published via Actifit app (Android | iOS). Check out the original version here on actifit.io


02/04/2023
7296
Gardening, Photowalking, Shoveling, Stair Climbing



0
0
0.000
19 comments
avatar

That was indeed horrific and saddening. May your dad take time to process his grief and mourn over his friend. God gives comfort to everyone who needs it with Uncle Onn's passing.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Thank you. At the moment he didn't get to see his coffin so he is still in an unbelieving state. Because uncle Onn was way stronger than him all these years.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Hugs to your dad for receiving such sudden news. The hernia thingy is not a small matter. Jansen one was diaphragm hernia so any hernia unrepaired could be dangerous.

But now, rest in peace to Uncle and also peace to your dad.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Hernia can really be a scary thing. Hope Jansen is much better now

0
0
0.000
avatar

Congrats on providing Proof of Activity via your Actifit report!

You have been rewarded 48.775 AFIT tokens for your effort in reaching 7296 activity, as well as your user rank and report quality!
You also received a 0.92% upvote via @actifit account.


AFIT rewards and upvotes are based on your:

  • User rank: which depends on your delegated SP, accumulated AFIT tokens, rewarded post count, recent rewarded activity and owned AFITX.
  • Post score: which depends on your activity count, post content, post upvotes, quality comments, moderator review and user rank.

To improve your user rank, delegate more, pile up more AFIT and AFITX tokens, and post more.
To improve your post score, get to the max activity count, work on improving your post content, improve your user rank, engage with the community to get more upvotes and quality comments.

Actifit shared its growth plans for 2023 with focus on hive services and integrations. Please vote now for our DHF proposal in support:
Vote on peakd
Vote on ecency
Vote on Hive wallet
Vote via hivesigner

rulersig2.jpg
Chat with us on discord | Visit our website
Follow us on Twitter | Join us on Telegram
Download on playstore | Download on app store

Knowledge base:
FAQs | Whitepaper
How to signup | Maximize your rewards
Complete Actifit Tutorial
rulersig2.jpg
Actifit supports cross-chain decentralization. Support our efforts below by voting for:

0
0
0.000
avatar

It was a real shock to hear the news of uncle Onn. We always keep thinking that he's the "iron man" among all of dad's friends.

Stubbornness isn't a great thing when health is the issue.

0
0
0.000
avatar

@littlenewthings...


Let me first say... I send my most heartfelt condolences, to you and your family. It is never easy to lose a loved one or family member. I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis back in 2016 while dealing with many other health issues. Not to take away from your post... just to let you know that I do understand the seriousness of health issues. So then... despite these circumstances, I truly do appreciate your using the Thoughtful Daily Post TAG. Combined with your ActiFit energy... I have suggested to many others to add to their ActiFit posts; it is none of my business what others post really. But if they use my TAG, then I do step in as well... it is my community lol.


I would also like to share another community with you... My dear friend @beeber created the following community, to help honor our loved ones that have passed. Whether human or pet. Let me share that information with you!


image.png

https://peakd.com/c/hive-152367/created


I just thought you might like to share this story there... Not a cross-post mind you. But a place to share his life's story, and honor him... his legacy forever remaining on our blockchain. Give this community a visit... see what you think, I am sure @beeber would be honored to see this story.

Love and light, my friend.

!LUV

0
0
0.000
avatar

Sorry for your loss @littlenewthings

And yes of course as Wes wrote, whenever it feels right for you you can write about your uncle in the hive memorial forest.

Sometimes it needs a little time to sort things out in our mind, but after a while things get clearer to write a loving positive memorial post.

Thanks for the mention Wes !LUV

0
0
0.000
avatar

Thanks so much @beeber for the suggestion. Maybe I'll ask my dad to have some thought to write it down. He's silently grieving at the moment.

0
0
0.000
avatar

You are welcome
I think everyone has its own way to deal with the loss of the ones we had to let go. Some things take time to heal in our hearts. Grieving and being sad is a normal thing, so the only thing you can do is to support your dad (and yourself) with loving kindness.
!HUG

0
0
0.000
avatar

Thanks for your response wes. I wasn't sure will the tag work but I am glad it did. I usually try not to just post something for the sake of earning especially for actifit. I am glad that you accept me tagging your community along.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Congratulations @littlenewthings! You have completed the following achievement on the Hive blockchain And have been rewarded with New badge(s)

You distributed more than 26000 upvotes.
Your next target is to reach 27000 upvotes.

You can view your badges on your board and compare yourself to others in the Ranking
If you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word STOP

Check out our last posts:

LEO Power Up Day - April 15, 2023
The Hive Gamification Proposal
0
0
0.000